The Blue Ocean

The Pacific Ocean. Standing there was good – it’s always good for me. As I looked out over the ocean I was thinking that this area is so tiny compared to the whole ocean. So I looked east towards Japan and thought about the people there. How many of them are falling in love today? How many of them will have their hearts broken tomorrow? Then I thought about places further beyond. I thought about people in Iran too. How many of them are wishing for change today? How many of them will be crying at funerals tomorrow?

I realize that I can’t make the world love me. I don’t have that power. But the ocean is blue and sensuous and that’s enough for me. So I sat meditating on the pulse of the sea and watching it crash onto the shore. I closed my eyes and listened to the wind and to the distant roar of the waves. I breathed in the ocean air. And, with a new thought, I opened my eyes again.

Yes, this is a small part of the whole, but doesn’t even this small fragment of ocean have power? Don’t its waves also shape the rocks? Won’t these high cliffs eventually crumble into its depths?

- Just a peasant

Photo from the Oregon Coast June 2009

I try too hard

I know I’m tired today, sitting here, listening to Pink’s new song Please Don’t Leave Me.

I need the ocean - the Pacific Ocean. I need its blueness and its vastness to fill my heart again. I need its raw power to remind me that I can’t make the world kind and gentle – that no matter how hard I try - I can’t make the world love me.

- Just a peasant

Photo of some flowers in case someone is sad and needs them tonight.

Between the storms

A small break between thunder storms.

- Just a peasant

Photo from a garden here on campus.

Life?

Sometimes, people try to draw me into a debate on embryonic stem cells and whether it is ethical to sacrifice an embryo to make these cells. I always refuse to participate. My answer to them is always the same:

Until this country stops dropping bombs on innocent civilians – men, women, and children – nobody here has a right to speak about the sanctity of human life.

It is absolutely absurd to discuss the ethics of tearing apart an embryo when your own country, on a weekly basis, tears apart the bodies of women and children. Weren’t their lives of value? Weren’t their thoughts and dreams of any consequence? As a rule, this country kills civilians. Innocent people – non-combatants. Iraq, Afghanistan, or to wherever the American monster wanders the end result is dead people. Not peace, not security, not even hope.

The United States is, by far, the largest exporter of military armaments in the world. Yet, Americans have the audacity to speak about preserving life? How ridiculous. Embryos don’t feel and they don’t think and they don’t form memories. But all those dead civilians did - as well as all those who are going to die in the next three years of occupation in Iraq and Afghanistan.

- Just a peasant

Fluorescent image of stem cells from one of my experiments.

Cyborg She (僕の彼女はサイボーグ)

This is a really nice movie and is definitely one of my all time favorites. I just got my DVD today which was shipped from Hong Kong. After seeing the movie I also ordered the soundtrack which is beautiful. I’m not going to tell you what happens – you just have to watch it for yourself.

And yes – I cried a lot (ToT)

- Just a peasant

I ordered through yesasia.com and I’ve never had a problem with them. Cyborg She.

Done!

So I finally got my PhD today. The defense wasn’t easy but at the same time, it wasn’t a bloodbath either. Of course, an hour beforehand, I prepared by listening to this song – something that seems to represent me to some degree. Man, Helloween was an awesome, but totally underrated, band! So by defense time, I was pretty amped up.

Anyway, after the defense, my professor wanted to go get a beer but, since I don’t drink alcohol, we just got a Coke instead. I really like him and will definitely miss him. But now my time here is limited – I can’t stay forever. I have other objectives the first of which is to roll back into medical school.

I have applications in New Zealand and Australia right now so we’ll see. I’m not exactly the traditional medical school applicant you understand. Yet, I am a scientist and I am obligated to continue my education, or the acquisition of new knowledge, until my last day of life. And I am perfectly comfortable with that.

As for getting a regular job to make some money? I have no interest in money. Money has never been important to me. And anyway, when I do have money I use it to buy meals for my friends, or to buy new science books, or cool movies, or things I need for lab experiments. Ultimately, the only three things that matter to me are becoming a better scientist, applying knowledge to solve problems, and the most important thing of all – Love.

And this is who I am.

PS: Please don’t think I’m being pretentious. I promise I’m not an arrogant person. It’s just that a defense seminar has a tendency to put one into an introspective and philosophical mood.

- Just a peasant

Photo looking north from the roof of our department.